When you`re depressed it may seem impossible to keep relationship going. When you feel terrible it becomes a real challenge to support your partner and let him support you as well. However you shouldn`t isolate yourself during the tough times because if you can`t deal with poor emotional state on your own, your boyfriend and other people who love you can help you handle it. Lots of couples break up when one partner suffers from depression but fortunately there are several tips on how to keep your relationship going even if you feel depressed.
1. Find someone to rely on
You`re going through hard times but you`re not the only one who has ever experienced this feeling of loneliness and sadness in life. You can find someone who has also had the same problem in the past. That person can help you deal with it faster because they know what you feel and what you need to hear to overcome your depression. Find someone you can trust and you won`t feel lonely in your relationship. Just because your partner doesn’t know how to help you doesn’t mean you should break up with him.
2. Think about your partner’s feelings
Depression makes you feel disgusting and it damages your self-esteem. You may feel like you don`t care about what will happen to you in future. However you can think about your partner’s feelings. Have you ever seen him suffering from anxiety or depression? You probably wasn`t happy about that, right? You wanted to help him and you felt worried. Therefore, you don`t need to neglect feelings of those who love you. Your partner also suffers when you feel miserable. If you love him, don`t ignore his care and do your best to overcome this little obstacle on your way to happiness.
3. Don`t isolate yourself
One of the ways to save your relationship when you feel depressed is to do at least small things with people who care about you. It can be a little coffee date, a road trip or a short walk in the park. These small things will truly help both of you feel a bit happier. Even though they don`t take a lot of your time and strength, they show your partner that you still remember about him and you really need him in your life.
4. Try something new
What is depression? It`s the result of some unpleasant circumstances that took place in the past. Those circumstances were the result of your everyday actions – things you always do, and your habitual behaviour. In order to change your current bad feelings, try to do something new with your partner. You may try to go shopping to some unknown places together. Or, take a new hobby or do something you`ve always wanted to try.
5. Think about the future
When we`re suffering from depression, we mostly think about the past mistakes, the present moment and how terrible we are now. But it`s better to think a bit about the future. Don’t dwell on it, though. Now you don`t want anything but how do you imagine yourself a few years later? You`re not going to suffer from depression forever, so try to set some important goals for your nearest future.
6. Don`t idealize
If you`re a perfectionist, you may feel ashamed of your emotional state. You may think your partner shouldn`t know what you feel. There`s no need to idealize yourself. You feel sad but you can`t be perfect all the time. Everyone has difficult moments in life and no one can be absolutely happy all the time. Don`t hide what you feel from him and don`t think that it`s the end of the world. Of course, you didn`t expect to have a depression but life is unpredictable so don`t worry, you`ll feel better again quite soon.
7. Journal for depression
When I suffered from depression a few years ago, it was hard for me to feel happy with my husband. My doctor recommended me journal for depression to get rid of my problems. The result was surprisingly quick and really great. After three days of writing down everything I was going through, I was able to figure out what were my flaws and why I lost so many friends. Depression makes it difficult to think clearly so why not keep track of your feelings on a daily basis? It will give a more clear picture of what you should do to recover faster. Write down at least a few sentences every day and you`ll see a positive emotional progress in a few days.
Yes you`re suffering from the worst disease in the world now but don`t let it take yourself away and lose important people in your life. Gather all your power and think about your partner and his happiness. You don`t want him to suffer with you, especially because of you. Just stay strong and don’t give up. What is the most difficult thing for you when you`re suffering from depression?
Credit: Diana White